Get back into dating after marriage
"It's common to sweep these emotions under the table, but you have to work through them or they'll pollute your life going forward," Alberti says.If you find yourself resisting the idea of therapy, you might want to keep in mind that therapy doesn't mean you have a problem or that you're in crisis."You have to work on getting confidence and faith in yourself and ability to believe in your own worth." This is also something you could pursue in therapy, or through Tip No.4: Especially if you were married for a long time, you may have given up a lot of the things you enjoyed as a single person because they didn't fit with your "couplehood." Maybe you loved to go out, but your spouse was a homebody.
So don't reject the idea of any change, just because you can't make every change.Find a way to work through the lingering emotions from the demise of your marriage, advises psychologist Robert Alberti, Ph D, co-author of Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends.That may mean talking out your feelings with a therapist or focusing your energy in a healthy activity you enjoy."As long as the changes you make are healthy and constructive, these are very appropriate," says Alberti."Think about who you want to be -- the person you were before the marriage, or maybe a new person?