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Or if you see gullible friends or family members passing them around, share this article with them and rub it in their faces.

• Olympic gold medalist Michael Phelps’s announcement that he will come out of retirement and compete in the 2020 games in Tokyo. We love a sweetly styled pooch, but our beauty counter remains just for you. • The rental car company Alamo‘s new fleet of “Self-Vacationing” vehicles that serve as personal concierges for drivers.

Introducing Bloomingtail’s, our luxurious spa for your pampered pooch. #talltail A post shared by Bloomingdale's (@bloomingdales) on • Georgia Tech’s online degree, a “Master of Science in Gadgets” in which students will be given “a 28 gallon crate full of miscellaneous broken electronics, cables, machines, and tools,” and are required to “fix at least 70% of them” to graduate. • Siri knows users are trying to mess with the Apple voice-command feature. • The fake spelling test given by Joe Dombrowski, a teacher at Oakland Elementary School in Royal Oak, Michigan.

We’ll be offering canine contouring, posh blowouts, doggy massages, and more. (CBS Detroit published a full list of the bogus words online.) • Bob Evans’s beauty line offering a “farm to body experience.” • COFFEEMATE has a coffee-flavor COFFEEMATE brewing.

• “Sofia” the first “smart sofa” by home goods site Wayfair that features a voice-recognition system that can read out the owner’s calendar and built-in parental controls that can correct rowdy children and pets that may start jumping up and down on it.

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